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Porth Joke is a place west of Newquay that cannot be reached by road. Between Kelsey Head and Pentire Point West, this sandy beach is in a pretty, small cove. The bustling Cornwall town of Newquay is just 5 miles away from this secret beach. The north-west-facing Porth Joke Beach features rock pools and caves at low tide. It is situated in between Crantock and Holywell Bay, two of the most popular beaches.